// Duality, Pt. I//

If I’m in a relationship with someone, there has to be a lot of duality to their personality because there is a lot of duality to mine.
I spend half of my time thriving in own interests and being alone. Adventuring through many ideas, topics and projects. I also love spending time thriving in other people’s ideas and socializing. If my partner can’t appreciate both of those sectors of my personality, half of the time, we won’t get along.
My personal style also has a bit of bipolarity. I wake up in the morning, and put on what I feel comfortable with. One day, it’s a darling dress, accessories to match, the next is a button up and some trousers. The latter can put a wrench in a guy’s masculinity, if his own confidence isn’t deeply rooted.

I can’t even play Little Talks on the guitar anymore because it’ll just turn into a What If God Was One of Us medley.

I feel pretty proud that yesterday was payday, and for the first time, I hadn’t been counting down the days.

I’m pretty good at digging myself a hole of awkward.

There I was, in a food aisle Target. I get giggly and Corey asks what’s wrong.
“There was a cute cute girl, so let’s go,” I put my arm out as I turn the corner, “this way!” And nearly hit the poor girl in the face.
Whoops.

I also went to Rue21 (where I’m aiming to be assistant manager), was chatting with the guy ringing me up and he didn’t ask if I wanted any fragrance like he was supposed to, so I brought it up myself. He had me test nearly all of them and didn’t really like any, but I didn’t have the heart to say, “you know what? Nevermind”. I bought the best of the worst and now I smell like a hooker. Sweet.

I don’t really like parties.
I mean, I enjoyed myself,
But I spent most of my time in my friend’s room, smoking and having a good time.
Everyone downstairs were dancing and yelling.
I stood next to a very attractive guy and girl and listened to them cut down and critique every person around. It was really uncomfortable. All they had to say about me is my hair is cool, and I’m fairly androgynous. That’s cool I suppose.
My friend ended up necking on the couch with her birthday boyfriend.
And I text in the rain alone.
I like it that way.

I’m such a lonely duck.

Quack.